Title: Inalienable Rights
            From: Monty Python's Life of Brian 
  Transcribed By: Dwayne A. X. E. E. ( CS107124@YUSOL ) 

 
(A huge Roman amphitheatre, sparsely attended.	REG, FRANCIS, STAN and JUDITH
 are seated in the stands.  They speak conspiratorially.)
 
Judith:  Any Anti-Imperialist group like ours must *reflect* such a
	 divergence of interests within its power-base.
Reg:	 Agreed.
	 (General nodding.)
	 Francis?
Francis: I think Judith's point of view is valid here, Reg, provided the
	 Movement never forgets that it is the inalienable right of every
	 man--
Stan:	 Or woman.
Francis: Or woman...to rid himself--
Stan:	 Or herself.
Reg:	 Or herself.  Agreed.  Thank you, brother.
Stan:	 Or sister.
Francis: Thank you, brother.  Or sister.  Where was I?
Reg:	 I thought you'd finished.
Francis: Oh, did I?  Right.
Reg:	 Furthermore, it is the birthright of every man ...
Stan:	 Or woman.
Reg:	 Why don't you shut up about women, Stan, you're putting us off.
Stan:	 Women have a perfect right to play a part in our movement, Reg.
Francis: Why are you always on about women, Stan?
Stan:	 (pause) I want to be one.
 
(pregnant pause)
 
Reg:	What?
Stan:	I want to be a woman.  From now on I want you all to call me Loretta.
Reg:	What!?
Stan:	It's my right as a man.
Judith: Why do you want to be Loretta, Stan?
Stan:	I want to have babies.
Reg:	You want to have babies?!?!?!
Stan:	It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
Reg:	But you can't have babies.
Stan:	Don't you oppress me.
Reg:	I'm not oppressing you, Stan -- you haven't got a womb.  Where's the
	fetus going to gestate?  You going to keep it in a box?
(Stan starts crying.)
Judith:  Here!	I've got an idea.  Suppose you agree that he can't actually
	 have babies, not having a womb, which is nobody's fault, not even the
	 Romans', but that he can have the *right* to have babies.
Francis: Good idea, Judith.  We shall fight the oppressors for your right to
	 have babies, brother.	Sister, sorry.
Reg:	 (pissed)  What's the *point*?
Francis:  What?
Reg:	  What's the point of fighting for his right to have babies, when he
	  can't have babies?
Francis:  It is symbolic of our struggle against oppression.
Reg:	  It's symbolic of his struggle against reality.